Thursday, December 10, 2009

Go where you're Fed (let it be Free)

Last night before a concert in Seattle, I was speaking with my friend Stefan. We were talking about cities in the U.S. and what could be a good place for a creative songwriter like me to live.

He said "go where you're fed". 

Not " move to blah blah blah, it's an Awesome place!" or "go here, I know 5 dozen people there who will make you famous".

Go where I'm fed? Uggh. Of course, now a new handful of questions arise - What's feeding me? Who's feeding me? And where are they? What exactly DO I do and where will it be nourished? 

But I know Stefan, and I'm most likely wasting some good brain and heart-space on questions. Because I bet his question was probably a little spiritual and philosophical and a nudge in my direction that I should go within. I think I need to let the idea of "go where you're fed" settle, spread out, find nooks and crannies and lodge itself to a place where it might grow a bit and discover itself.  

What's ironic is that in recent months, I've come to a greater sense of who I am and what I want, but I'm completely blank when it comes to this "go where you're fed" thing. I'm now not even sure just what exactly in me desires feeding.  

Let me add another little nugget - last night before I spoke with Stefan, my friend Erin posed this question: "what would you do in your life, even if you didn't get paid to do it?".  

Are these two kidding me? 

OK, the things that I'm doing now in my life, do I love them enough to do them for free?

What exactly AM I doing in my life? I don't know.  And that's OK because all this question stuff is allowing me a turnaround opportunity.  Sometimes in life, we do what we're doing and we never have the opportunity to stop, step back and view in.  What are we doing? And are we really loving what we're doing? And are we living in a physical space and an emotional space that feeds us? And would we do it for free because it feeds our hearts so much? 

Maybe I can start a list - a list of things I'd do for free because I love them so much I can't see straight. And when things start to get clearer, I bet I'll be led to the place that's feeding me.

What a meal that one will be. Yum. I'm ordering an appetizer.

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